Since May 11, 2011, I am officially a married man. Just like I promised my church friends, the moment I got married, I’ll turn my back in anything connected to the Youth ministry. The normal temptation and tendency of someone who used to be a youth leader is still to meddle (in Tagalog transliteration, “nakikialam”) with their own church’s youth ministry.
The concern to your former organization is just normal. The habit of going to church because there are leaders’ meeting, the fact that God allowed you to lead a group of youngsters (if left unchecked, gives you the tendency to have the “kuya/ate complex”) is a hard habit to break, especially if you’ve been in the ministry for about 10-20 years! However, just like high school graduation, just like college life, just like further studies (if God gave you the chance), things must come to an end. “Grow up!” as some maturity/age freaks will say to you. Right. Grow up. That also means not to interfere of meddle with Youth ministry related stuff, unless asked to do so. That also means not to give them unsolicited advice. That also means giving them positive image when asked by outsiders or those who used to be active attenders.
Yes, a newly married man/woman should still have single friends of mixed genders. Befriending the young ones will contribute to optimism. However, when it comes to matters like youth ministry, a newly married Christian man/woman should leave them alone.
You’ll not expect any flashy literary regarding my married life. I’ll not dazzle. I’ll discipline myself not to give “ecclesiastes type” of advice to the youngsters. I find it irritating when someone newly married gives you unsolicited advice and to the point of calling you immature.
It’s been 12 days since I got married. I’ll learn the ropes brick by brick, as days go by. By God’s grace, I’ll learn the ropes.