Friday, February 20, 2009

Maturity part 2

5) He is open to other people’s ideas – this doesn’t mean that you’ll accept ALL. This means you’ll take time to listen to another people’s ideas. He’ll not make fun of other people’s ideas simply because it looks “weird”. I remember a cartoonist Gilbert Monsanto. He said to me, “I’ll try to listen to his ideas, maybe he’s got a point”. I can’t help but shake my head every time I encounter people who don’t listen to your ideas or what you are sharing because an idea about you was already established on them. Worse, they’re single ladies!
6) He is able to work on long term goals – parents are good example of this. Now, if you’re starting to think on long term basis, that’s maturity.
7) He is guided by what is right – even if you will become unpopular. I’ve seen both men and women will compromise what is right over popularity. Keep mentioning that homosexuality is sin according to the Bible, you’ll be hated by LGBTs. Not only that, no one or only few will defend you. Recently, I have an experience regarding this in an internet based group. My goodness, no one defended me. When that internet-based group ITSELF was criticized by a member on specific matters, many reacted, the posts being talked about for at least 2 or 3 weeks. Popularity over what is right. Now, I don’t say that you forced what you know is right to others. It’s just that when the time comes that you need to decide what is right – GO ON, even if people will turn their backs. It shows maturity.
8) He is responsible – this means if you did something wrong, have the guts to ADMIT IT. Gender has nothing to do with this. I don’t care if you’re a lady or a gentleman. After admitting, negotiate your way in what ways you can demonstrate your being responsible. Say “sorry” when it is needed. Personally, I admire people who admits their mistakes and underwent the consequence of it (discipline) more than a person who keeps on hiding his mistakes, even using friends to hide it, just to look neat and presentable, and, no offense, spiritual. The latter indicates immaturity. The former indicates the opposite.
9) He is independent – this is in general term. Yes, it’s not wrong to accept other people’s ideas especially if you think it would be the best choice, but NOT ALL THE TIME. Being independent doesn’t mean you’ll move out of your parent’s house because you don’t want to be “dictated”. That’s rebellion. It’s the art of knowing when to accept and not to accept ideas.

Now, let’s go back to the very first paragraph (part 1). Many people, ladies in particular, whether they admit or not focus on the part “...being aware of the correct time and place to behave and knowing when to act in serious or non-serious ways”. However, they neglect what follows after that, especially the ones written in bold letters: “Maturity is something of personal character, or how one acts in stressful or difficult situations, because then a person's true ability to react to a situation can be seen. Additional ways to judge if a person is mature include rational thinking and logical explanation in solving a problem, and the art of reasoning while debating.”

(To be continued...)

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