Thursday, July 31, 2008

There are really people who can’t be trusted. I know. I know. Most of you, especially those people who know me, will say, “we know that”. It is a fact. Even Jesus Christ was betrayed by Judas Iscariot.

That’s why it’s difficult to be a Christian (and acting genuine Christianity) to unbelievers. You must not be judgmental, but at the same time be cautious. How many times was I reminded not to trust anyone? Plenty. That’s why I was called “naïve”. Even if the character looks doubtful, I tried to be a kind soul still. Thus, when someone spreads rumors that I’m not a good person, it tears me apart, no matter how many times I experienced it.

Now, let me explain what this ranting is all about. My grandparents told my Mom that my former driver told them my stupid mistakes back when he’s still working for me. I’ll not mention what those stupidities are. I might get sidetracked. Because of this, in that lazy Monday morning, Mom gave me a mouthful of reminders. It’s okay. She’s my Mom. What I don’t like is that those stupidities occurred 2006, and those who followed my blog and my other blogs know what happen in 2006. Besides, I maybe talkative, but I’m not gossiper. That former driver, despite the kindness I’ve shown to him, still gossips my stupid mistakes back when he’s still in my then-apartment. Good thing Mom talked about it only briefly. Still though, it’s enough for my Monday to be ruined…not entirely though.

I was surprised (but not totally) that a guy like him is a gossiper. After all, if you look at him, you’ll say that he’s your couch potato looking guy…not those metrosexual looking guy. He’s not effeminate. Thus, it is surprising. Actually, I’m just humoring you readers. Still though, jokes are half meant. Oh well, I don’t want to dignify that person’s deed further. To sum it up, he’s wrong big time. Period. It just shows the person’s true character and attitude. What I don’t like is that I was trying to regain my composure, proving my Mom and Big Bro that I’m no longer that stupid and undiscerning with people (naïve). Besides, it was part of the past. Oh well, those stuff should not be dignified. After all, that former driver is no saint, but that’s another story.

Another experience is more recent. A few hours ago, Big Bro texted me that he received a news that I was flirting around with a neighbor’s baby sitter. I told him that I haven’t “talked” to that girl (when I say “talk” with quotation marks, it means flirting around). Besides, this one I didn’t mention: it’s been a few weeks since the last time I saw her. Big Bro found out that through his daughter’s babysitter. According to Big Bro, the rumors are spread in my niece’s school! Poor girl, if she just knows the mess that babysitter did.

Yes, I have been typically kind, like I usually do to other girls (unfortunately, that gave me the “trademark playboy”). I do admit that I humor her (for she’s my neighbor). I never explained my side to Big Bro. I just said that I haven’t talked to her for quite sometime. Big Bro told me not to talk to that woman again. That’s easy. Yes, that’s easy. Besides, she’s outside the “church system”. Keep on talking, and it will just come back to her. I am used to that issue, even back in the Old Church. In that aspect, the words, “I don’t have to please everyone” is very much applicable. That’s another reason why I don’t defend myself that much: my defense is not needed by those who love me and is not believed by those who hate me. Why bother? Back in the Old Church, there are issues against me, especially in how I deal with the opposite gender. I may have stated many things in my blog (for this is my journal), but it’s quite rare that I defend myself. When a man is being accused of being playboy or promiscuous, the best defense is silence. Besides, people who love you won’t need your explanation; people who hate you won’t believe it. I just hope those who know those will not make a big deal out of this. What if they made a big deal out of this? I’ll just explain to them, but not in details.

Oh well, despite my doubts to specific people, why I still befriend them despite of “the tingling spider sense”? The Bible says, “…love thy neighbor as thyself” (Matthew 19:19). Yes, the Bible said, “Let not then your good be evil spoken of:” (Romans 14:16), but it is Jesus Christ Himself who said that we should love our neighbor as ourselves. God have given me an adequate (not heightened) discernment, with people, but that doesn’t mean I will prejudge them. The Bible is against that (Matthew 7:1).


Again, I just hope and pray that this will not be a big deal tomorrow.

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