I have many ways to take away this so called negative energy. Especially now, I tried to make ways in which I can release negative emotions. People these days don’t like people that talk and talk and talk. Especially in this corporate world that I’m in, “silence” means maturity. I don’t know if this is just my feeling, but “friendly guys” nowadays are not the in-thing in the corporate world. Corporate people judge people according to this so-called breeding (is it another word for hypocrisy? He he he he). You know, you must be well-behaved. No, don’t get me wrong. I still believe that a person inside a corporate world should have that “aura of respect”, and it is only possible by behaving appropriately with the environment.
However, I’m more of a speaker than a listener. Maybe it is embedded in my persona. I have what Tim LaHaye called a “Sanguine-Choleric temperament”. Although being a Christian made me thinking not to stick too much on my “inborn personality” (meaning I should improve), I just can’t help that at times, I am a loud mouth. Time and time again, Mom always reminds me of my tongue, especially when I’m representing the company.
That’s one of the reasons why, at first, I wanted to land a job away from the company, so that whatever I will say will not ruin the company’s reputation. When I was a kid, church people, when they noticed something “weird” to me, will always either talk to my Mom or my Kuya. Back then, it is quite unfair. Even back then, I believe in the concept of individual differences.
Because of this predicament, I found a way to release this negative energy. Usually, you’ll see me in the gym either before or after work. Usually, I’ll spend at least 90 minutes there. My, I miss the time that I’m in the gym for 3 hours! At home, you’ll notice me in my bedroom reading. Yes, I read my Bible (which I consider not as a hypocrisy, but because an individual Christian needed to have time reading God’s Word for “reproof, correction” and “inspiration”). Then, I’ll read other stuff. After reading, you’ll see me either drawing my series of Comic Strips entitled, “GradS Tayo”, which I usually submit in my Deviantart account. There is also this blog. Not only I can speak out here, but there are also people who will tell me things and encouraged me.
Just recently, I added a hobby: poetry. I was “introduced” to poetry by my DA friends. As of this date, I find poetry as a creative way to release negative energy. Instead of shouting at someone, or confronting them (in which at the end, I admit it is pointless. Nowadays, denials are everywhere), do it poetry. After all, art is an expression. Yes, I still am a talker, but this hobby (I consider working with the youth not as a hobby by the way. It is more than a hobby.) helped me release constructively.
Yes, I’m still a predominantly sanguine-choleric person; at least it made my view in life lighter. Indeed, God have given this talent with a purpose.